For his sake
by Pannecake
Summary: Set after Doomsday. Rose feels him, and it hurts. RoseTen. Rose POV


Title: For His sake

Summary: set just after Doomsday. Rose feels him, so close, it hurts. TenRose. Rose POV.

Disclaimer: not mine... except one day when he's not expecting it "WHAM!" David Tennant will wake up tied to my kitchen chair :p then he'll be mine. :-)

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I was just getting used to it. The loneliness. It had filled my heart for months now. Each day that passed by it became more and more bearable. Time seemed to drag on while I was getting used to it. Each hour like a day...each day a week. it never seemed to end. The Torment of my soul. I could feel my heart slowly breaking and healing each day. Desperately trying to fill the cracks with something substantial. But nothing seemed as filling as the original. Today as I sat in my office trying to ignore the nagging lonely heart, that amazingly still beat with in my chest, I felt him. Just a little. I could feel his presence. I knew it was only my imagination, but part of me prayed it wasn't. I turned and was filled with grief as I saw only an empty room before me. I placed my pen back on the desk and stood up for a moment. I could feel him so strongly. My heart seemed to break all over again. This stabbing pain in my heart. I placed my hand over my heart to make sure it was still beating. I walked down the stairs of the office building, something was pulling me. I felt as if I were in a deep trance. Walking aimlessly with no purpose but deep down with more true intent than ever before. I pushed the door open and exited the building. I felt it tug stronger. The magnetic pull of the hearts that were forever melded with my own heart. It was as if some one had found a way to bring me back to him. It kept pulling stronger and stronger. I could feel the hot tears forming in my eyes. My heart was on fire, but not with breaking, or anger, or pain, it was a happy burn. I could feel him so strongly. I kept walking the tears rolling down faster and faster. He was so close. I walked around the corner knowing he would be there. That's when I feel to my knees and cried. I would always be alone. I felt the cool rain begin to fall, just a light drizzle. The alley way was barren. Just like my soul had become since I had lost him. Empty, dried out, unable to provide life, devoid of life it's self. I couldn't bring myself to live anymore. I wanted to die. He thought I would be happier with my family, I love them dearly. But I loved him more. I felt the tug once more but I did not give into the overwhelming sensation. I knew it was only my mind tricking my heart so it might break. I got to my feet and brushed off my skirt. I began to walk back t o my office when I heard the distant whir. I stood at a stand still as it grew louder and closer. Then it stopped. I began to walk again when I heard the gentle shut of a familiar door. It couldn't be real. 

"I've finally come back" The familiar voice said. "It's been so long"

"You aren't real" Was all she said as she began to walk away.

"Turn around and you'll see how real I am"

"If I do and you are there, when you disappear I'll have to heal all over again"

"Please, Rose, just look at me"

I spun around and I saw him. Shock filled my heart and I felt as if I would faint. I walked slowly up t o him the tears caressing my cheeks. I lifted a hand to touch him a and he willingly let me do so. He was so soft. So real. So warm. How I longed to be warm again. Instead of this cold dead soul of my own. He placed a hand upon my cheek and I felt the warmth flood through me. I began to sob hysterically.  
He looked at me in concern.

"If I look away you will be gone, if I let go you'll leave" I said through the tears. "So alone, so long...so dead"

He held me tightly.

"Rose, you're with me now, I'm back"

I felt it, the need. The need to feel him completely. I pulled from his embrace and looked him directly in the eyes. With out warning I found myself kissing him with such a passion that no one could have felt such a rush of emotion as I did at that point. I kept my lips upon his breathing heavily. The surprising thing is he did not push me away, resist, or act surprised. Instead he return the favor with equal passion no words could describe. I need to feel him. To know he was safely their, that he would never leave. He leaned in close to my ear and rested his head on my shoulder.

"Rose Tyler, I love you"

And then like that his body left mine. His loving touch no longer graced my arm. His eyes no longer captured mine. I was alone in the world again, just like before. But my barren soul was filled with something new. I no longer felt the empty nagging feeling, I felt the over joyous love return to me. My heart no longer broke into a thousand pieces, the pain had been dulled. For now, but soon I would long for his addictive touch...son I'd feel the loneliness invade my soul...but for now I would be happy, for his sake.

THE END


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